Category: minimalism

Lessons in Motherhood and Materialism

Lessons in Motherhood and Materialism

by No Makeup Mama ♥ 1 Comment

Yesterday, my oldest, Evangeline [3-years-old], went to the movies with a girlfriend, so my inner mamma bear was immediately preparing to soften the blow for my son [2-years-old], who I assumed would be devastated because he couldn’t go too.

My first thought was to take Theo to Target to pick out a new toy [from the bargain bin, of course – my kids’ FAVORITE]. I was still considering this as a viable option until it dawned on me how ridiculous and hypocritical it is of me to try to comfort my son with shopping.

Here I am, trying to teach my children that happiness does NOT come from stuff that you can buy – or even from the experience of shopping – and yet my first tendency was to have him buy something so he wouldn’t feel sad.

[Side note: This whole plan was based on my assumption that he would be sad. There wasn’t even proof he would be – and of course, he wasn’t the least bit bothered.]

Here was the perfect opportunity to teach my son a lesson about a). how to deal with disappointment and b). what gives real joy in this life and I nearly blew it!

So, when the moment arrived, I held Theo’s hand and said “Sissy is going to go see a movie with Charlotte and you and I are going to go to the park to play. How does that sound?” And he was perfectly happy with that. In those three hours together, he received more focused attention [though not completely because Josephine was also with us] than usual because of the absence of Evangeline. We played and laughed and I don’t think he ever thought about what his sister was doing.

In the end, I think I’m the one who learned a few things, not Theo. I was reminded of two important lessons about motherhood:

1. I don’t need to shield my kids from every disappointment. Even though it’s my natural desire to protect them from every possible moment of sadness, it is my job to show them proper ways to handle disappointments – and retail therapy is definitely not one of them. On the other hand, physical activity is FANTASTIC therapy [and good for you too]!

2. Possessions don’t make you happy. I believe that the greatest sources of joy in life don’t come from getting, but from giving. In this case, giving time and attention to each other, doing something that we love [being outside and active] was way more enjoyable for Theo and I than walking around Target would have been.

It makes me wonder if my children are so stuff-obsessed because that’s what I’ve been modeling for them. Are kids born with the desire to accumulate more and new stuff? Or is that something I [with the help of our consumerist society] am instilling in them?

I clearly have to be more cautious about encouraging materialism in my kids.

Anyway, we had a great day and we didn’t come home with any cheap plastic doo-dads that would be broken or forgotten in a matter of days. Just a few photos of our day together.

Karis

Creating Mini-Minimalists

Creating Mini-Minimalists

by No Makeup Mama ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

What you see in the picture above is one of three identical shelving units we have in our home – all stuffed to the max with toys. There is nothing “minimal” about the toy situation around here, but I realize that these toys belong to my kids and I can’t just go throwing them out all willy-nilly. It has to be the children’s choice.

So, last night, I opened a Rubbermaid container and asked my kids to choose the things that they no longer want and would like to give away and to put them in the bin.

I fully expected my kids to rebel against this idea or maybe put two toys in the container and adamantly insist that they simply must keep everything else.

Boy, was I wrong.

They filled the entire thing.

[If anyone sees something they gave to my kids, please don’t be offended, it has all been well-loved. And trust me, most of what is in this bin is from Brett and I.]

Still, I was doubtful that they really understood what was happening to the toys in the bin, so I left it in the living room overnight and this morning we went through everything again.

They changed their minds about a few things [Eva decided to keep her Moana dolls and Theo wanted to keep the plastic blocks] but everything else was still a firm “give it away.”

It’s not like they don’t have plenty of toys left to go around.

This entire basket is filled with little people and cars and animals – which I didn’t count, but is so obviously excessive – and yet my kids love imaginative play with these characters, so we will keep them all…for now.

And my living room shelving unit looks much better.

It obviously won’t stay this tidy, but they reduced the amount of toys in this unit by 253! That definitely makes a difference! Everything fits in the baskets and cubbies without being crammed and squeezed. And now they can look through a bin for what they want without dumping its contents all over the floor [which they will probably still do anyway, I realize].

After the group of toys were finalized, I sorted them into recycle, donate, and trash piles. I threw out trash and put the recycle pile in the recycling bin, but I am keeping the donate items for a little while just in case someone gets “givers remorse” in a few days. But I bet that none of these things will be missed now that they are out of sight.

Throughout last month, our kids watched us give away tons of things – often wanting to participate. I explained at that time why we were getting rid of the items [we don’t need them or use them] and what we were doing with them [giving them to other people who may need them or use them]. I think this prepared them for giving away their own belongings.

As always, the best way to teach your children a behavior is to model it, and by modeling minimalism, we are creating some mini-minimalists!

Karis

30 Day Minimalism Game: Days 24 – 30

30 Day Minimalism Game: Days 24 – 30

by No Makeup Mama ♥ 1 Comment

Well, we did it!

Between the two of us, Brett and I got rid of [more than] 930 belongings in the month of June – and we didn’t even get started on the second story of our shed OR the kids toys!

Since we had an unexpected trip to Kentucky the last few days of June, we combined the last few days into a couple photos.

We needed 387 items for last week, but we ended up getting rid of 499, which brings our grand total for the month to 1,042 items gone!

This month, I’m doing the #MinsGame again, but with the kids’ stuff!

I CAN’T WAIT! [Which is good because it starts today.]

Karis

Recycling Pens & Markers

Recycling Pens & Markers

by No Makeup Mama ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

When we moved into this house [18 months ago], I brought with me every writing utensil that was in our last home and I was super proud of myself for gathering them all into this one organized [and even labeled] plastic container.

My goodness, how things have changed.

Anyway, today was the day to go through this EXCESSIVE amount of pens, pencils, markers and highlighters and PURGE!

First, I needed to determine how many of them actually still work.

The vast majority still have plenty of life in them. The ones on the lid [a grand total of 58] are empty and headed for recycling.

Of the ones that work, I have chosen to keep these:

The sharpies and colorful pens are for craft and art projects – which have been the only reasons I have reached for this container in the past year.

Everything else is getting donated.

The grand total came to 109 utensils to donate and 58 to recycle.

Sad thing about recycling, though, is that I need five pounds [or roughly 350 pieces] in order to mail them in to TerraCycle…so, anyone got some empty pens they are looking get rid of? Realistically, I will probably have to find a place that collects them because it will probably take me the rest of my life to use 300 more pens.

[As a side note, if you work for a big company that is not currently recycling their pens – you should encourage them to start. More info in recycling pens RecycleNation.com.]

As for the ones that are still good, I’m going to donate to the gym I work at which is run by the park district [they seem to ALWAYS be short on pens], or to a school maybe, or to PenGuyArt.com, or …well, I’m open to suggestions.

Anyone need some pens?

Karis

30 Day Minimalism Game: Days 17 – 23

30 Day Minimalism Game: Days 17 – 23

by No Makeup Mama ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

Well, this is definitely getting harder.

We fell behind for a day or two [so I guess we technically “lost”] but we just kept right on going, sometimes reaching into the organizers in our closet and just grabbing handfuls of hotel shampoo bottles we’ve apparently been hoarding for years in order to reach our quota [which at one point was a total of 66 items] for the day.

Tip for you aspiring gamers – DON’T FALL BEHIND! The numbers get overwhelming really quickly.

Also, the game has basically turned into a joint effort to reach our collective goal each day since Brett doesn’t have the time to find all these items. That means that today I am finding 40 things to accompany the 8 that Brett picked out before leaving for work this morning.

I’ve learned more interesting things about donating foreign coins and recycling half used bottles of lotion. We also are up to six different organizations who are [hopefully] benefiting from our purge.

I did throw away a small bag of little things that can’t be recycled and couldn’t be sold in a thrift shop or even reused. Sad, but it had to be done.

And the greatest challenge is yet to come because not only do we have a whopping 378 items left to go before we reach the end of this madness…but we are leaving town on Wednesday so we have to get rid of them all in the next THREE DAYS.

Heaven help us.

Karis

30 Day Minimalism Game: Days 10 – 16

30 Day Minimalism Game: Days 10 – 16

by No Makeup Mama ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

So far, Brett and I have rid our home of 272 unnecessary belongings. Thanks to regular trips to various donation drop offs and a few trips to friends’ homes, we have actually removed most of these things from our home already. It feels great.

Here are the photos from this past week.

Finding things to get rid of is still easy. My house is literally full of unnecessary stuff. And I haven’t even gotten started on the kids’ toys yet!

Truthfully, I have never been very attached to my belongings and I’m not very sentimental about “stuff,” so it is probably easier for me than the average person. In fact, when we moved into this house, I threw out my wedding dress without even a second thought. Why keep a dress that I will never wear again?

In an effort to keep an open mind, I recently picked up this book at the library: The Things that Matter by Nate Berkus.

It’s my nature to question everything – especially my own ideas – and though I feel strongly that minimalism is key to a happy and meaningful life, I do want to understand the importance people place on their possessions [since I apparently missed this gene]. I’m already reading a lot of books about minimalism and waste reduction, but when I saw this book I realized that there is another side of my belongings to consider.

This book reads like an autobiography but subtly shows how a collection of things – even mundane and seemingly meaningless things – can serve the purpose of connecting us to people and places that we love.

[I should mention that this book isn’t saying anything about how many or what kinds of possessions one should or shouldn’t own. It isn’t against minimalism in any way, nor is it for it. It is just stories about lives and the possessions that accompany them.]

It doesn’t change my perspective on minimalism or make me suddenly want to hang on to my middle school artwork, but it does give me a broader perspective. When I bring things into my home, I want them to be purposeful, yes, but maybe it’s okay if they are just plain beautiful or meaningful to me.

I don’t know if I’ll find many things like that, but it’s good to keep an open mind. 😁

Karis

One Month of [Nearly] Zero Processed Foods

One Month of [Nearly] Zero Processed Foods

by No Makeup Mama ♥ 1 Comment

Besides reducing waste and clutter, I have also been slowly eliminating processed foods from our home and replacing them with homemade alternatives – in an attempt to simplify our eating habits. But I wanted to stop buying pre-made foods altogether – immediately. It took some time, but Brett [miraculously] agreed to give the idea a trial run during the month of June.

100% whole wheat bread that I make every ten days or so. Takes me 2 hours, including rise and bake time – and I knead by hand so a stand mixer would make it even faster!

So, Rather than buying pre-made, packaged, and convenience foods, I am only buying the foods that I cannot make myself. Everything else, I am making from scratch – or doing without. I am still buying milk, cheese, meat, seafood, seasonings, and the basic baking necessities [i.e. flour, sugar, yeast, baking powder, olive oil, etc.] – which are all “processed” to a degree, but that I can’t process myself. Unprocessed foods that we buy are fresh fruits and vegetables, raw nuts, legumes, grains, and seeds, pure honey and maple syrup.

This change will [hopefully] allow us to improve our health, reduce our waste, and save some money in the grocery department.

Homemade rosemary and sea salt crackers. Took me 20 minutes to make one batch which was the perfect number of crackers for my kids’ afternoon snack.

This means more work for me in the kitchen, but it’s not really as bad as it might sound. I started very small about a year ago, with just making my own peanut butter every two weeks. Over time, I’ve added things that I can easily fit into my schedule. And now I am making jam, bread, yogurt, cottage cheese, applesauce, vegetable stock, pasta sauce, salsa, hummus, crackers, tortillas, potato chips [baked, of course], donuts [also baked and on rare occasions], granola bars, muffins, biscuits, pesto, nut milks and even vegan cheese. Some things I make regularly to keep stocked, and other things I make as needed. Pretty much anything we could need, I can make with just the basic ingredients I keep in my home. It may sound time consuming, but most of the things I make don’t require very much hands on involvement from me.

[I know that a lot of people work full-time and aren’t able to dedicate much time to making food from scratch, but you may be surprised at how many things are quick and easy to make – like peanut butter, which only takes three minutes to make in my Ninja or the cashew milk below.]

Cashew milk I made for breakfast smoothies yesterday. Took all of three minutes to make, not counting soaking the cashews overnight.

I’m doing this partly because it is the simplest, healthiest way to eat and partly because it significantly reduces our waste AND partly because I’m curious to see if this will be more expensive. The most common reason I hear for not eating healthy foods is that it’s too expensive. Since healthy, natural, organic foods are typically more expensive than their processed counterparts, I’m curious to see if it costs us more financially. I suspect that healthy eating actually saves money, but costs more time. [Then, of course, “time is money” to some people, and that is exactly why convenience foods were created in the first place.] Regardless, I doubt I’ll regret the change because the healthiest thing is always best – even if it does cost more money and more time.

Besides all that, making things from scratch is rewarding and makes my fridge look clean and organized! [If my 20-year-old self could hear me now, she would probably pass out from shock. I guess I’m proof that people can change. 😁]

Karis

30 Day Minimalism Game: Days 3 – 9

30 Day Minimalism Game: Days 3 – 9

by No Makeup Mama ♥ 2 Comments

Well, we made it through the first week of the Minimalism Game. Even though I know it is supposed to get harder as the days progress, I feel like it is actually getting easier to find things to toss. Now everywhere I look I am seeing things we don’t need or use.

The hardest part has actually been figuring out how to get rid of all this stuff responsibly.

The worlds of minimalism and zero waste overlap in a lot of ways, but this process has made it tough for me to please both of these internal desires. Both care about the environment, but have different primary goals. Reducing what you own to a minimum and only buying what is absolutely necessary creates very little waste and purchasing everything waste-free often ends up being very minimal, out of necessity. BUT the process to get from where I currently am [or was] – a wasteful hoarder – to where I want to be – a waste-free minimalist – is creating a lot of trash.

The minimalist in me says “GET RID OF IT,” while the eco-friendly hippie in me chants “REUSE, REPURPOSE, RECYCLE.” [I imagine these two internal personas as little angels, one on each of my shoulders, shouting into my ears.] Every time I select something to get rid of, the hippie says “Maybe you could use that in some other creative way.” And then the minimalist says “You know you won’t use it, so just let it go.” And then the hippie says, “But you don’t want that to end up in a landfill, do you?” And the minimalist says, “You don’t want to carry that around with you for the rest of your life just so it doesn’t end up in a landfill, do you?”

Do you see my struggle?

So, what do I do?

Well, I’m trying to compromise. I have to get rid of the excess, AND I have to do it in the most responsible way that I possibly can. And that takes some time. Some stuff may end up in a landfill. I feel badly about it, but I can’t redeem every bad purchase or every superfluous possession. Something will inevitably have to go in the trash. But for everything that can be repurposed or given away or donated or recycled, that’s what I will do – even if it takes me a little longer. We are supposed to be getting rid of the stuff each night, but, honestly, that doesn’t feel responsible to me. I have to take the time to appropriately dispose of all this stuff. I have to do research to find out how and where and what to do with some of these things. I have to think about whether I should repurpose old t-shirts into dust rags or whether that would just be making more clutter. I have to ask friends and family members if they could put some of these things to good use. But some things I just have to let go.

Like, for instance, Brett’s senior picture proofs – all 75 of them.

These can’t be donated or recycled or even burned and even though I wouldn’t ordinarily want to get rid of old photos, I do not want to hang on to 75 photos of Brett’s 17-year-old self.

[We did read about a way to reuse old photos as game pieces by cutting the heads out and placing them in binder clips, which is hilarious and brilliant, but won’t help me reduce my clutter.]

So, into the trash they went. [And they take up quite a bit of space in our new small trash can.]

All except two, which I use as bookmarks now – partially because he is nicer on the eyes than the Bed Bath and Beyond coupon I had been using and partially because I like to laugh at his baggy clothes.

Anyway, here are the photos from this past week of the game.

On the plus side, the house is already looking better, and we’ve still got three weeks to go!

Karis

30 Day Minimalism Game: Days 1 & 2

30 Day Minimalism Game: Days 1 & 2

by No Makeup Mama ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

Starting yesterday, Brett and I are playing the 30-Day Minimalism Game.

The game is played by each person getting rid of one item the first day, two items the second day, three items the third day, … you get the idea. Whoever is able to make it the furthest in the challenge wins – though the only thing at stake is bragging rights – and whoever makes it to the full 30 days will have rid themselves of 465 unnecessary possessions. If Brett and I both complete all 30 days, then we will have gotten rid of 930 items from our home in one month – a great start on the road to minimalism!

Truthfully, we probably won’t make it that far because Brett is doing this reluctantly to begin with and already on day one he tried to get rid of our baby monitor [that was currently in use] and my brand new running shoes. I’m not sure he understands the point of the exercise. Regardless, I’m going to have to set some guidelines [if you ever saw Brett and I play a game together, you would understand why written rules are an absolute necessity].

The 30-Day Minimalism Game Rules:

#1: No tossing the other’s personal belongings [but kids’ toys and things we share are free game].

#2: No tossing things that we are actually currently using and serve a good purpose.

#3: No tearing a piece of paper into however many pieces and trying to count that as your day’s quota.

#4: I can’t toss clothes unless they are in addition to my 26 items already getting donated each month.

#5: Items must be donated, recycled, or given away to friends/family [in other words, not trash]. Things bound for the trash should just be thrown in the trash and not counted for the game.

I’ll be posting our donation items periodically throughout the month so as not to drive everyone crazy by posting every single day.

So, on day 1, I chose to rehome our beautiful bassinet, which I love. But it is too big for our space and won’t get any use until I have another baby – which may never happen. So it might as well hold another little baby rather than serving as a second laundry basket in my bedroom. I am hoping to find someone I know who would like it and use it [please let me know if you are interested!], but if I can’t I will donate it to a local Crisis Pregnancy Center.

Brett chose the kid’s old race track which has been replaced by a “new-to-us” track [Thanks, Aunt Mary!].

Our day two choices weren’t as exciting. But, as always, if you see something you want/need, let me know! Free to a good home. Otherwise, it is all being donated.

I can already tell that this is going to be an eye-opening endeavor…

Karis

May Clothing Donation

May Clothing Donation

by No Makeup Mama ♥ 1 Comment

Only four days since I began my clothing ban and it is already time to make good on my first promise. So, I’ve chosen the 26 items of clothing that I am donating for the month of May.

For being only the first month and having already admitted that I have so much I don’t wear [or have never worn], this was surprisingly difficult.

For example, the top two items on the pile are the same style half-zip fleece sweaters, just in different colors. And I really like them a lot. They fit great, the look good, they are very comfortable. But I have another one of the exact same sweater in white – which I like the best. When I had the choice [which I always did], I always wore the white one. As a result, these other two sweaters have each been worn maybe once [probably when I first got them]. So I have decided to donate them. Unfortunately, a ton of my wardrobe is duplicates. In fact, the majority of this pile is made up of duplicates. What was I thinking buying all this extra clothing?

This has been another reminder of what a privileged life I live compared to most people. I never thought of it this way before [actually I never really thought about it at all], but I realize now that it is a luxury to be able to go shopping for anything I want at any time, much less to find a shirt that I like and then buy it in five different colors. These are luxuries that the majority of people on this planet do not have. In fact, a lot of people are just happy to have clothes to wear. Shame on me for ever thinking of myself as not being wealthy when here I am with so much clothes that I don’t even wear half of it.

I used to think of my wealth in terms of what I didn’t have, rather than everything I already do have. And what I had was never enough – especially when it came to clothing. While it is partially the result of being surrounded by good old fashioned American consumerism – it is also a result of my own willingness to be convinced that I need more than what I already have. That is partially what this clothing ban is about – realizing that I already have plenty. I don’t need more. And I won’t let clever marketing or special sale prices or even my own insecurities tell me differently. Especially when the cost of feeding my constant desire for “more” is the safety and well-being of people around the world.

Well, I hope these items find new owners who show them more love than I did!

Karis